Transformative Love / Poem

You are transformative,
You transform everything into love -

You transform your death into the light of love within my heart,
If I would be with you -

You transform my love for you,
Into an invisible pathway of love...

You transform my invisible pathway of love,
Into a tangible present...

You transform this tangible present into your pure loving presence,
Which radiates love....

You transfer your pure loving presence into my heart,
Which you freely inhabit in the now....

You transform the freely inhabited now of my heart,
Into a gateway of your loving spirit -

You transform the gateway of your loving spirit,
Into a realm of love beyond form -

You transfer your realm of love beyond form,
And your spiritual space reaching beyond everywhere,
Into my heart...

You came to me first in a dream,
You came with your heart and with your love both awake -

Your love transformed our love into a gateway,
To the eternal love -

I stepped through our gateway to the eternal love,
And found there the realm of eternal love,
Which is now everywhere -

Thank you xx
.
© TitusL

art co brigitte jost

You Illuminate Me / Poem

Your shining heart darts brightly in as you illuminate my spirit,

Your joy and devotion are flowering here, as your love does begin it. 

 

My heart no more confined within, in yours does gladly dwell —

The soul of love knows so much more than memory could speak or ever tell.

 

My daily life is now imbued with your love's healing balm -

By heart sight alone I see your ineffable grace and charm.

In the mindful murmurings of my spirit - forever loving you,

I apprehend strange changes as the world transforms askew.

 

The written word reverses and is projected from within,

And the air around me flickers as your love comes tumbling in.

 

Startling, unnerving and delightful too, I know that this is you -

Auras of light dance before my eyes, I can barely acknowledge as true.

Allowing myself to see the light as wonders here are happening -

Setting aside thoughts and fears which are not needful but meerely maddening.

 

Faith says this and Science that, but your love says nothing at all -

For your love is unequivocal and the gentlest love of all.

 

Your spirit has ascended now to heights I cannot know,

Yet you are still beside me here and your love does forever flow.

.

© TitusL

art co peter and birgitte fich christiansen

You've Made A Believer Out Of Me / Poem

'You've made a believer out of me.

Once I was blind but now I can see.'

I had my doubts but you set them free.

I couldn't understand how this could possibly be -

Because once you were here and now you are gone,

But your love in my heart and your presence carries on -

Your wishes guide my choices and your love carries on,

With your energy all around me I can feel your essence carries on -

And your joyful-bright-caring spirit is just over there - carrying on,

And your beautiful garden of flowers and your friends all carry on -

Your sweet written notes that I have gathered around the house carry on,

And your afternoon walks in the fields come rain, shine or snow, carry on too -

And the tears from my heart-soul and memories are right here carrying on,

And so too is the knowing that you are with me all along -

That you are outside the physical world but all around me carrying on,

That this is not madness but spirituality carrying on -

That you are beside-with-near-inside my heart, carries on,

And because that carrying on-ness is you doing the carrying on, 

We carry on xx

'You've made a believer out of me.

Once I was blind but now I can see.'

© TitusL

art co brigitte devaia jost

________________________________________

When I wrote this poem I hadn't realised that the first phrase and rhythm, which presented itself from my unconsciousness, was actually borrowed from a 'CAN' song entitled Believer - a debt of gratitude is owed for that. 

 

I decided to keep the poem as it is however, because it goes on to express a my very personal view of finding Wendy's presence and love beside me and in my life still. 

 

I also favour the almost hymn like qualities of the start that are echoed throughout this poem, which thereby speaks of a spiritual awakening in our ongoing love. 

Angel Cards / Post

This morning after my yoga session and same as every morning I ask Wendy to 'place in my hand' the mornings choice of Angel Cards. I often ask a question out loud addressed to Wendy as she is right here, just not visibly/physically so...
Todays question was regards as it often is, how can I cope with her physical absence from my life?

The cards ( I 'take/am given' - three) gave me;

Communication, affirming what we were doing via the cards,
Faith,                  which I clearly need to carry on, and
Awakening -        my ongoing 'spiritual' awakening to her presence being with me...

If this is not sufficient indication of her choosing the cards and actually really being here with me, our little dog Rusty directly after this Angel Card moment, places himself sat in the living room doorway gazing intently at the front door, awaiting Wendy to come in..
They say that dogs and creatures do perceive things beyond our range of eyesight.

If this is not enough to indicate that he felt Wendy was near to us, when I then walked up the stairs to have my shower, he raced up with me which he never does and leapt onto our bed and sat looking expectantly...

I took another card to ask her how to cope with Rusty missing her too, 
the card was Surrender.
And besides it on the table had 'fallen' / was another chosen by Wendy
Tenderness

I am in tears now, of grief and of gratitude xx


TitusL

art co peter fich christainsen

 photo of angel cards chosen by Wendy co TitusL

____________________________________________________

Angel Cards are a great way to connect with your angels or the spirit of your loved ones. 

Whether you 'believe' in angels and spirits or not, the cards help us look at the world in ways that infuse our lives with vitality and assist us to experience the deeper levels of understanding by evoking our intuitive abilities and renewing our spiritual connection to our own deeper innner self or spirit. Our attention and energy do to some extent follow our intention in life and if we open ourselves up the notion of a higher power guiding us and ask for guidance choosing a card from all those laying face down (so that we cannot bias the choice) the message on the card chosen may be from a higher power, an angel or spirit /or it may not. Either way the actual messages can then be taken as a guide to the day 

to inspire and uplift us. 

A bit New Age for some or too spiritual for others, they have a genuinely calming and positive influence on my outlook and that prooves they are effective for me. 

Originally made by hand, Joy Drake and Kathy Tyler started the angel cards some 39 years ago while living at the Findhorn Foundation in Scotland. I have never been to Findhorn but I have heard of it often - The Findhorn Foundation is situated in the north east of Scotland and it is a spiritual community, eco village and an international centre for holistic learning.

~***~

Suddenly A Rainbow / Poem

Suddenly a rainbow came singing songs I couldn't hear,
Today she stepped smiling forward from a steely dark grey sky,
Snow capped mountains climbed quietly behind her while two white swans flew slowly by,
Their white necks and wings glided serenely across her glowing radiance with a sigh,
You are here...
 
Neither born nor died you ever are a high vibration of pure light shining,
An endless emanation of love temporarily transformed anew,
To manifest these several years during my life on earth as you,
Now outside of the window of everything and inside of my heart forever,
We are together -

Barely conscious of the metaphysic in this bubble of cosmic space,
Within which I am curled up like a sleeping snail within its shell,
But without which I will become something else as well,
I look with wonder to your love letters falling to me gently through the sky,
You are everywhere -

This love could not be called affection, infatuation dosen't tell it,
Romantic love barely begins to say and devotion cannot spell it,
The bliss of several thousands then is but the briefest introduction,
This is universal -

The shining of your transcendence in these divinely magic moments,
They are singularly beautiful, deeply healing and terrifying too,
Because this is what we have now,
This me and you vision is true,
This is not a metaphor,
This is love -

© TitusL

 art - shekinah co brigitte finch

art co birgitte jost

You Are My Love / Poem

Without you beside me,
I am no longer here nor am I not here,
I have no place in this world anymore now that you are not in it, 
I have no place in the beyond for you have not called me to be with you,
I cannot be hopeful for there is no hope to be found here without you,
Nor can I be glad any more for there is no gladness after the sun has gone without ever coming back,
I cannot dream of you because when you left here the moon of my dreams left with you,
I am not going anywhere for there is nowhere to go to if you will not be there to meet me, to come home to,
I cannot raise up my heart in song for you, as the song falls from my soul like a stone when it sees you are not here and the birds fall from the sky in tears,
Each day, every moment that you are not in it I am lost without you,
I am not in my life anymore,
I cannot cross the divide to be with you and I cannot stay here without you,
I cannot.

But, you can shine your love across the unwalkable way and make my heart come alive again,
You can and you do call the sun to sing and as it rises the birds celebrate your love once more,
You bring the moon back with new dreams that you place on my midnight pillow,
You bestow the hope that does not have a name nor a reason but is hopeful,
You bring the happiness that hides in every moment and you set it free,
You make the garden bloom and all the flowers dance for your smile,
You bring my universe to a halt and then let it leap forward into your joy once again,
You take the iron band off my brow and place there a star of your delight,
You come to me in your silence and you whisper your heart into me,
You have my heart forever,
You are my love

© TitusL

Art co Brigitte Jost

The Rose / Poem

The Rose;

'We create our reality by thought and intention'.
Say the new age teachers, gurus and mystics -
But sometimes that seems a harsh circumvention,
There's so many in need of love and compassion.
However it is not I who conceive of endless war -
The phrase refers to our own life orientation, nothing more.

If I find difficulties they stem from my choices.
Yet the modern world shows us only confusion -
While senseless demands allow no time for reflection,
And causality holds us accountable by collusion.

Cultural aspects do not unify or cohere,
Yet we can choose to live in love's ideal -
I therefore share a circumspect view,
We may positively charge our spirits, but not everything.

Cancer took the body of my wife -
She was fit, ate healthily, excercised well,
We lived simply, in joy without strife -

If it had been found a few years before
We could perhaps have repelled it.
But stage 4 terminal cancer was a life ending sentence -

Maybe radiation, environmental or food issues intervening -
A cultural lack of due screening.
In perfect health we did not seek out countless disorders,
To live so would be on neurosis bleak borders.

This situation does not make us a victim, quite the reverse -
For in accepting 'the world as it is' we are spiritually freed its toll, to traverse..

I have heard people say - they brought ill health on themselves..
To declare our circumstance a consequence thus
Is an ignorance we must replace with understanding.

Some might say God or Karma decided this way -
Or the sins of the father as inherited ailments can be a thing.
But to conceive the divine so cruel is an unlikely downswing.
For the divine nurtures all with unconditional absolute love..

My beloved was well balanced and at peace with the world,
Overflowing with love and with joy -
She still is such a bright soul and carries on just the same,
Although no longer with a physical body to deploy

Within the remarkable unfoldments of our time on this Earth,
Our choices do influence our lives directly -
Spirit, heart-mind and outlook are so deeply connected.

Keeping open to the light despite trials direct or obscure,
Leads us to a place outside of everything where our love does endure.
It's who we really are.

© TitusL

art co brigitte jost

_______________________________________

This poem adresess the concern I have felt when some spiritual authors and speakers state that we are responsible for everything that happens to us. Clearly we are not.

Whilst I do share the belief that we are to a large extent masters of our own life/spirit voyage through the choices we make and our outlook, but we also must accept that other factors will intervene on our journey and that they do overturn our lives. To deny this is in my view a form of existential torment that does not speak of compassion or understanding at all. The fact that these situations visit us does not mean that we have failed in our 'walk with God' or in living positive lives. If anything, these are the circumstances which try and proove us, for we can throughout our troubles still choose to walk our path with love as our guide.

I am finding the new circumstances of living with Wendy's loving presence but without her physical one, to leave me no alternative than devote myself to a life focused in spirit. On this walk I hope to share some uplifting outlooks when I can xx